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Where the Paved Road Ends: Country Girl Problems – Oklahoma Farm & Ranch
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Country Lifestyle

Where the Paved Road Ends: Country Girl Problems

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By Beth Watkins

Moving to the country sounds like an easy transition: things are a little slower, and it’s definitely not as populated, the people are friendlier and your land is your land, you can hunt, fish, ride 4-wheelers, shoot guns and skinny dip. But, I’ve discovered moving to the country takes a little getting used to. I am experiencing what I call “country girl problems.”

When I went to the U.S. post office to set up my P.O. Box and get my mail transferred, I had a difficult time catching the U.S. Post Office open. The window hours are 8 a.m. to 12 p.m. Monday through Friday. I stopped in one night around 7 p.m. to get my mail from the box. The lobby was locked. Back home the post office lobby was open all the time. If you had an account or a rented mailbox at the UPS store then you were issued a key to the mailbox lobby and had access to the copy machines.

The next time I caught the lobby open, I informed them that I did not get my key for the front door, so I could access my mail after hours. Silly city girl misunderstanding turned into Country Girl Problem #149. If you want to get your mail, the lobby hours are 8 a.m. to 6 p.m. Monday through Friday and 8 a.m. to 12 p.m. on Saturdays. If you can’t wait, call the key keeper’s cell phone and he will meet you there and let you in. That situation remedied itself last January! The lobby is now open 24/7.

Country Girl Problem #791 is when you have hand washed and detailed your truck, pulled it back in the garage and a few days later, when you need to go to town, it’s rained and you’ve got a dirt road a mile long to the paved road.

Even the sayings down here in southeastern Oklahoma are different.

While on our trip to Tulsa, I asked GW if we could go to the mall and do some shopping. I expected his usual sweet answer, “Of course baby,” but it was followed by a phrase I had never heard before, “But, I would rather pick black pepper out of a chicken’s butt!” So now, what’s a girl to do with an answer like that? I call it Country Girl problem #99 since I’m 99 miles from my mall, and online shopping is all I have.

Nights out are different down here too! Jon’s Country Corner gas station/convenience store and tire shop is the social hub of Indianola, Okla. Every Friday night they serve up the best catfish, hushpuppies and brown beans you will ever lap your lips around, complete with award-winning desserts. During dinner a few locals entertain us by a-pickin’-an-a-grinnin’. You have to get there early to get a good table by the band.

Bonfires are very popular here, also. It seems like random people smell the fire and just show up. One night I witnessed a young girl pack her lip with a dip bigger than my husband does. Her friend held her beer so she wouldn’t get it mixed up with the beer bottle she was spitting her dip inside. As I pondered things like, “Who taught her to dip, and why?” and “Does her mother know?”  My brain was screaming a phrase GW’s used before, “I have been to three goat ropins’ and a county fair, but I ain’t never seen nothing like that before!” I realized at that moment, GW’s funny sayings have found their way into my vocabulary.

Read more in the September issue of OKFR!

Country Lifestyle

Farm Dogs & Table Scraps

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Growing up on a farm, our dogs were tough. They roamed the pastures, slept under the barn, and ate just about anything they could get their paws on—whether we meant for them to or not. I’ll admit, I never thought twice when one of our old cow dogs snatched a biscuit off the table or licked up a spill from the barn floor. I’ve even seen a dog steal a whole rib bone off a plate and trot off like he’d won the lottery. And somehow, they always seemed fine.

But here’s the thing—just because they survived doesn’t mean it was safe. For every farm dog that lucked out, there’s another that wasn’t so fortunate. Some human foods can be downright toxic to dogs, and a little bit of bad luck (or a smaller, more sensitive dog) can turn a harmless snack into an emergency.

Common toxic foods lying around the farmhouse

Are table scraps good for your dog? (Stock photo)

If you’ve got a farm dog—or any dog, really—you need to be aware of the dangers lurking in everyday foods. Some of the biggest culprits include:

Chocolate – The darker it is, the worse it is. Even a little can cause vomiting, seizures, or worse.

Grapes & Raisins – No one’s exactly sure why, but they can cause kidney failure fast.

Onions & Garlic – In large enough amounts, these can destroy red blood cells, leading to anemia.

Xylitol (Found in Sugar-Free Gum & Candy) – This artificial sweetener can send a dog’s blood sugar crashing and cause liver failure.

Alcohol – Even small amounts can be deadly to dogs, affecting their nervous system much more than it does ours.

Bones from Cooked Meat – While not necessarily toxic, they can splinter and cause serious internal injuries.

Macadamia Nuts – These can lead to weakness, vomiting, and even paralysis in dogs.

What to do if your dog eats something toxic

First, don’t panic—but don’t ignore it either. If you know your dog ate something dangerous, call your vet immediately. They can tell you whether to induce vomiting or if it’s something that requires urgent care. If it’s after hours, contact the ASPCA Animal Poison Control Center (888-426-4435) or the Pet Poison Helpline (855-764-7661).

Prevention is always the best medicine, so keep toxic foods out of reach. That might mean keeping the trash can secured, making sure kids don’t slip the dog a treat under the table, or just being more mindful of what’s left on the counter.

Our farm dogs might have been lucky, but luck isn’t a great strategy when it comes to their health. A little awareness goes a long way in making sure they stay happy, healthy, and ready for the next day’s work.

For more information
ASPCA Animal Poison Control: www.aspca.org/pet-care/animal-poison-control

Pet Poison Helpline: www.petpoisonhelpline.com

Visit www.akc.org/expert-advice/nutrition/foods-your-dog-should-never-eat

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Country Lifestyle

Summer Squash and Corn Chowder

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By Lacey Vilhauer

Total time: 40 minutes

Servings: 6-7

Ingredients

  • 6 slices bacon, cooked and crumbled and 1 1/2 Tbsp rendered bacon fat reserved
  • 1 1/2 lbs yellow squash, chopped (about 3 medium)
  • 2/3 cup thinly sliced celery
  • 1 cup diced onion
  • 1 Tbsp flour
  • 2 cloves garlic, minced
  • 2 3/4 cup milk (I used 1%)
  • 5 cups canned or fresh cut corn (from about 6 ears corn), divided
  • 1/2 cup heavy cream
  • 1 1/2 tsp chopped fresh thyme (or 1/2 tsp dried)
  • 3/4 tsp salt, then more to taste
  • 1/4 tsp freshly ground black pepper, then more to taste if desired
  • 3/4 cup shredded cheddar cheese, for serving
  • Chopped green onion for garnish (optional)
  •  

Instructions

Heat 4 tsp reserved bacon fat in a large pot over medium-high heat. Add celery and onion and sauté 2 minutes then add the squash. 

Saute until tender, about 6 minutes, adding in garlic and flour during last 2 minutes of sauteing. Reduce heat slightly.

Add 1 1/2 cups milk, 2 cups of the corn, thyme, salt and pepper to the sauteed veggies. 

To a blender add remaining 3 cups of corn, remaining 1 1/4 cups milk and the cream. Process in blender until nearly smooth (about 30 seconds). 

Add pureed mixture to pot and stir to blend. Cook until mixture reaches a light boil. 

Serve warm with shredded cheese, crumbled bacon and sliced green onions if desired.

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Country Lifestyle

Western Housewives – May 2025

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By Summer McMillen

All my married life I have thought that when husbands all got together horseback after a hard days work they were probably rating their wives on a scale from one to ten based on their various capabilities. Did Wife A have a good hat crease? Was Wife B good help in the branding pen? Was Wife C an excellent mother? Was Wife D hospitable to everyone? Could Wife E make a decent gallon of sweet tea? Did Wife F keep a tidy saddle house?

Presumably, when Wife B did not live up to Wife A there was a fist fight followed by wife shaming of Husband B. His status amongst the cowboys immediately fell and he would be behind for the rest of his life in his cowboy career.

He would come home ashamed his wife couldn’t flambé a decent bananas foster and she couldn’t hoolihan either. He would be distraught and said wife would feel his pain.

Of course, this never happened to me like I thought it would. My husband always came home with a smile on his face and I’m pretty sure “flambé” isn’t even in a cowboys vocabulary.

Nonetheless, these imaginary fights and social rankings have plagued my brain for years.    It has caused me to always be in competition with myself to be the very best at everything I did. Which I have eventually realized is a trait of women all around the world.

While we are cooking a four course meal for our families we start to think about how we actually should be practicing heading steers instead.

While we are practicing our horsemanship we start to think about how we should actually be preparing a nutritious and elaborate meal for our families.

It is a constant battle that women have created and proceeded to fight for centuries.

One day the inner battle got to me and I finally broke down as we were riding wheat pasture and confessed to my husband my guilt. I was so sorry that I wasn’t a better cowgirl. I was so sorry that the house was a mess. I was so sorry that I would never be on The Cowboy Channel. I was so sorry that I had lost his good pair of gloves. (Except I didn’t actually mean to confess that last part. Some things are just better left unknown.)  I apologized again and again and told him I was sorry and he probably never wanted to bring his friends over for supper ever again.

Instead of consoling me, he just started looking at me like I was crazy. Which is what all good husbands do.

He stopped his horse and looked at me and said “Do you know how cowboys rate each other’s ranch wives?”

So many thoughts started filling my brain. Was it looks? Gentleness? Laundry speed? Work ethic?

Then he revealed their secret. “Cowboys rate  each other’s wives by how well they can cook eggs for breakfast.”

His point of course, was that men don’t think about each other’s wives. As long as they get their eggs for breakfast. In another twist of irony, my husband taught me how to fry the perfect egg. What can I say? It’s a man’s world.

Since then, I have let go of my irrational fears and doubt and have simply been living life. It’s all anyone can do. I may not team rope the best. I may get my fingers when I’m trying to dally and I may not have the tidiest saddle house. But I try hard at everything I do and I do it all out of love for my family and finally, myself.

So, if you’re a woman this Mother’s Day and you catch yourself feeling down amongst life constant pressures just remember you are not alone. You can almost guarantee there is a woman in every household that needs a little pick me up. Maybe you should just go outside. Maybe you should sit down and count your blessings. Or, maybe you should have your husband fry you some eggs.

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