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Where the Paved Road Ends: Happy Wife, Happy Life – Oklahoma Farm & Ranch
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Country Lifestyle

Where the Paved Road Ends: Happy Wife, Happy Life

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By Beth Watkins

One morning shortly after we got married, I woke up to an empty house. I panicked, “Did I do something in my sleep to upset him—Did I snore? Did I drool? Why wouldn’t he have told me ‘bye?’ It’s not like him to not kiss me goodbye!” I take one long look in the mirror at the wild hair-do that I had been working on all night and decided the honeymoon must be over. I was heartbroken. He later laughed and explained, “I didn’t want to disturb you. You were snuggled up underneath the covers.”

So, the first of many unspoken rules was established. I may not coherently respond, but I always get a mandatory kiss goodbye. I know, to some people that sounds a little on the high maintenance side, but that sweet little gesture goes a long way at making me happy. As my man says, “Happy wife, happy life.” He’s a very smart and happy man. I learned a long time ago that great relationships don’t just happen, they take work.

At our humble abode, he goes to work, and I’m a housewife. Not only does he have a J-O-B, he raises cattle and everything that entails. As stated in a previous article, my job title is domestic goddess. Since we are in the season in life where it’s just me and him, I have a lot of time to devote to making our home the place where there is nowhere else in the world he would rather be. Men like to be taken care of, but not handled.

Taking care of GW is easy as he eats whatever I put on the table. He likes his clothes heavily starched; therefore, most of his laundry goes to the cleaners, which makes me happy, and I get a bonus: he takes me to lunch. One week they lost his laundry bag, and since he is a creature of habit, all week long his dirty clothes routine was messed up.

They still hadn’t found his bag by the next week, and they were out of new ones. After threatening to not take his clothes to the cleaners, I did what any smart wife would do. I went to the store and bought him a new bag. When I took his laundry to the cleaners, I smiled and asked them to please do me a favor. I pleaded, “Please make sure we get the bag back. My husband is threatening to stop using the cleaners and that will throw a kink in my routine. Not only would I be slaving over the ironing board at home, I wouldn’t get to go out to lunch.”  When I picked up his laundry the next day they made sure I had two bags. Again, happy wife.

Now, there is a fine line when it comes to taking care of him, but not handling him. I learned early-on the unspoken rule, “The man picks out his own clothes.” If I were to lay out jeans and a shirt for him, that would be classified as “handlin’ him.” Not only does that phrase make me giggle, but I can’t say it without rolling my eyes. And rolling my eyes is one of his unspoken rules.

One important bit of information for a happy relationship is to always remember that men are wired differently than women.  And as great as my man is, he, like most men, does not read minds. Women who think that men should just instinctively know what needs to be done will always be unhappy. Studies show that women use more words in a day than men. So, don’t just pout and stew over something, use your words to help him know what you are thinking. But, be very aware, there is a fine line between suggesting and nagging.

The art of making a request with successful end results is all in the way you word it. As a rule it’s never wise to begin a sentence with “Why do you always…” It’s better received with “Do you mind if I make a suggestion…” Also, be careful with your words, and that goes both ways. A harsh or hateful word hurts no matter how big of an ole boy you’ve got.

One day we were working cows, and I was on the head gate. Everything was going just peachy, until a calf became stubborn and was causing major problems in the sweep. It finally got turned the right direction and was headed my way, but in all the commotion I got sidetracked and accidentally let him escape. That caused a few new unspoken rules to be dealt with. “If you are going to help, keep focused on your job, don’t be chasing squirrels,” and “If you yell at me in a tone that you wouldn’t use if it were your best buddy, then I quit and you can do it yourself. See me walking and you know you’ve got trouble.” I’m the best, well “only” hand he’s got, so he should choose his words and tone wisely.

The upside to having me as his helper is that I try to make our chores fun. I plan ahead. A well, thought-out lunch in a picnic basket, a blanket and a Bluetooth speaker made some great memories the day we built fence down by the creek.

Life is stressful enough; try to make the best of it. Look for a way to laugh, remember to flirt with each other, keep that spark alive. I love when I get my “good mornin, baby” text from GW. It always starts my day off with a smile because I know he’s thinking about me. I know being a boss is hard and at times frustrating, so I text him little love messages throughout his day so he will look forward to coming home to me. Today’s message was “I love you like a fat kid loves cake!”

“Kiss me when you walk through the door” has never had to be an unspoken rule. It happens naturally, because we both have been looking forward to the homecoming all day. They say Disneyland is the happiest place on earth, but I don’t agree. I think it’s at the end of this dirt road: where we live, laugh and love.

Country Lifestyle

Farm Dogs & Table Scraps

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Growing up on a farm, our dogs were tough. They roamed the pastures, slept under the barn, and ate just about anything they could get their paws on—whether we meant for them to or not. I’ll admit, I never thought twice when one of our old cow dogs snatched a biscuit off the table or licked up a spill from the barn floor. I’ve even seen a dog steal a whole rib bone off a plate and trot off like he’d won the lottery. And somehow, they always seemed fine.

But here’s the thing—just because they survived doesn’t mean it was safe. For every farm dog that lucked out, there’s another that wasn’t so fortunate. Some human foods can be downright toxic to dogs, and a little bit of bad luck (or a smaller, more sensitive dog) can turn a harmless snack into an emergency.

Common toxic foods lying around the farmhouse

Are table scraps good for your dog? (Stock photo)

If you’ve got a farm dog—or any dog, really—you need to be aware of the dangers lurking in everyday foods. Some of the biggest culprits include:

Chocolate – The darker it is, the worse it is. Even a little can cause vomiting, seizures, or worse.

Grapes & Raisins – No one’s exactly sure why, but they can cause kidney failure fast.

Onions & Garlic – In large enough amounts, these can destroy red blood cells, leading to anemia.

Xylitol (Found in Sugar-Free Gum & Candy) – This artificial sweetener can send a dog’s blood sugar crashing and cause liver failure.

Alcohol – Even small amounts can be deadly to dogs, affecting their nervous system much more than it does ours.

Bones from Cooked Meat – While not necessarily toxic, they can splinter and cause serious internal injuries.

Macadamia Nuts – These can lead to weakness, vomiting, and even paralysis in dogs.

What to do if your dog eats something toxic

First, don’t panic—but don’t ignore it either. If you know your dog ate something dangerous, call your vet immediately. They can tell you whether to induce vomiting or if it’s something that requires urgent care. If it’s after hours, contact the ASPCA Animal Poison Control Center (888-426-4435) or the Pet Poison Helpline (855-764-7661).

Prevention is always the best medicine, so keep toxic foods out of reach. That might mean keeping the trash can secured, making sure kids don’t slip the dog a treat under the table, or just being more mindful of what’s left on the counter.

Our farm dogs might have been lucky, but luck isn’t a great strategy when it comes to their health. A little awareness goes a long way in making sure they stay happy, healthy, and ready for the next day’s work.

For more information
ASPCA Animal Poison Control: www.aspca.org/pet-care/animal-poison-control

Pet Poison Helpline: www.petpoisonhelpline.com

Visit www.akc.org/expert-advice/nutrition/foods-your-dog-should-never-eat

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Country Lifestyle

Summer Squash and Corn Chowder

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By Lacey Vilhauer

Total time: 40 minutes

Servings: 6-7

Ingredients

  • 6 slices bacon, cooked and crumbled and 1 1/2 Tbsp rendered bacon fat reserved
  • 1 1/2 lbs yellow squash, chopped (about 3 medium)
  • 2/3 cup thinly sliced celery
  • 1 cup diced onion
  • 1 Tbsp flour
  • 2 cloves garlic, minced
  • 2 3/4 cup milk (I used 1%)
  • 5 cups canned or fresh cut corn (from about 6 ears corn), divided
  • 1/2 cup heavy cream
  • 1 1/2 tsp chopped fresh thyme (or 1/2 tsp dried)
  • 3/4 tsp salt, then more to taste
  • 1/4 tsp freshly ground black pepper, then more to taste if desired
  • 3/4 cup shredded cheddar cheese, for serving
  • Chopped green onion for garnish (optional)
  •  

Instructions

Heat 4 tsp reserved bacon fat in a large pot over medium-high heat. Add celery and onion and sauté 2 minutes then add the squash. 

Saute until tender, about 6 minutes, adding in garlic and flour during last 2 minutes of sauteing. Reduce heat slightly.

Add 1 1/2 cups milk, 2 cups of the corn, thyme, salt and pepper to the sauteed veggies. 

To a blender add remaining 3 cups of corn, remaining 1 1/4 cups milk and the cream. Process in blender until nearly smooth (about 30 seconds). 

Add pureed mixture to pot and stir to blend. Cook until mixture reaches a light boil. 

Serve warm with shredded cheese, crumbled bacon and sliced green onions if desired.

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Country Lifestyle

Western Housewives – May 2025

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By Summer McMillen

All my married life I have thought that when husbands all got together horseback after a hard days work they were probably rating their wives on a scale from one to ten based on their various capabilities. Did Wife A have a good hat crease? Was Wife B good help in the branding pen? Was Wife C an excellent mother? Was Wife D hospitable to everyone? Could Wife E make a decent gallon of sweet tea? Did Wife F keep a tidy saddle house?

Presumably, when Wife B did not live up to Wife A there was a fist fight followed by wife shaming of Husband B. His status amongst the cowboys immediately fell and he would be behind for the rest of his life in his cowboy career.

He would come home ashamed his wife couldn’t flambé a decent bananas foster and she couldn’t hoolihan either. He would be distraught and said wife would feel his pain.

Of course, this never happened to me like I thought it would. My husband always came home with a smile on his face and I’m pretty sure “flambé” isn’t even in a cowboys vocabulary.

Nonetheless, these imaginary fights and social rankings have plagued my brain for years.    It has caused me to always be in competition with myself to be the very best at everything I did. Which I have eventually realized is a trait of women all around the world.

While we are cooking a four course meal for our families we start to think about how we actually should be practicing heading steers instead.

While we are practicing our horsemanship we start to think about how we should actually be preparing a nutritious and elaborate meal for our families.

It is a constant battle that women have created and proceeded to fight for centuries.

One day the inner battle got to me and I finally broke down as we were riding wheat pasture and confessed to my husband my guilt. I was so sorry that I wasn’t a better cowgirl. I was so sorry that the house was a mess. I was so sorry that I would never be on The Cowboy Channel. I was so sorry that I had lost his good pair of gloves. (Except I didn’t actually mean to confess that last part. Some things are just better left unknown.)  I apologized again and again and told him I was sorry and he probably never wanted to bring his friends over for supper ever again.

Instead of consoling me, he just started looking at me like I was crazy. Which is what all good husbands do.

He stopped his horse and looked at me and said “Do you know how cowboys rate each other’s ranch wives?”

So many thoughts started filling my brain. Was it looks? Gentleness? Laundry speed? Work ethic?

Then he revealed their secret. “Cowboys rate  each other’s wives by how well they can cook eggs for breakfast.”

His point of course, was that men don’t think about each other’s wives. As long as they get their eggs for breakfast. In another twist of irony, my husband taught me how to fry the perfect egg. What can I say? It’s a man’s world.

Since then, I have let go of my irrational fears and doubt and have simply been living life. It’s all anyone can do. I may not team rope the best. I may get my fingers when I’m trying to dally and I may not have the tidiest saddle house. But I try hard at everything I do and I do it all out of love for my family and finally, myself.

So, if you’re a woman this Mother’s Day and you catch yourself feeling down amongst life constant pressures just remember you are not alone. You can almost guarantee there is a woman in every household that needs a little pick me up. Maybe you should just go outside. Maybe you should sit down and count your blessings. Or, maybe you should have your husband fry you some eggs.

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